BackWho you’re talking to dictates what you say. Review our Communication Styles if you haven’t already. And remember: These examples show communication skills, and do not indicate correct or incorrect viewpoints.
Choose the communication style of the person you’re speaking to:
If you hear them say…
“Guns aren’t the problem. It’s mental health that’s the problem.”
👍 Try this…
“I agree that there are a lot of complicated reasons someone might use a gun on themselves or someone else. I also think limiting gun access is part of the solution.”
- Find areas of agreement, and use “I” statements to make your point.
👎 Avoid this…
“You’re putting your love of guns before the safety of kids in schools.”
- Criticize the idea or the policy, not the motives of people who support the idea or policy.
If you hear them say…
“You say you want to address mental health, but then oppose government spending to do just that. Isn’t that hypocritical?”
👍 Try this…
“I get that this sounds hypocritical to you. Can I explain my reasoning?”
- Start by acknowledging that your views are complicated. Ask if they’re willing to hear your side. If not, exit the conversation.
👎 Avoid this…
“I’m hypocritical? You Democrats want to restrict my gun use but turn a blind eye to all the gun violence in our cities.”
- Firing back with charges of hypocrisy never works. Don’t assume all members of a political party view issues the same way.
If you hear them say…
“Typical. You sound like every Democrat I know who just wants to take away our gun rights.”
👍 Try this…
“I think there are a lot of responsible gun owners out there. I just think that we need stronger protections to keep guns away from people who could misuse them.”
- Make clear that your views are nuanced.
👎 Avoid this…
“You sound just like every Republican I know.”
- Avoid political stereotypes.
Additional communication styles...