Who you’re talking to dictates what you say. Review our Communication Styles if you haven’t already. And remember: These examples show communication skills, and do not indicate correct or incorrect viewpoints.
Choose the communication style of the person you’re speaking to:
If you hear them say…
“It doesn’t matter who won in 2020. Let’s just focus on other things.”
👍 Try this…
“I’m not here to fight. I’m genuinely curious about everyone’s views here.”
- Acknowledge their feelings and offer reassurance.
👎 Avoid this…
“If you can’t handle this conversation, you don’t have to participate.”
- Don’t be mean to a Peacekeeper who is already anxious.
If you hear them say…
“You know the rules: We don’t talk religion and we don’t talk politics.”
👍 Try this…
“I get it. We can talk about this another time.”
- Table the conversation for a different day.
👎 Avoid this…
“Why are you so afraid to talk about this?”
- Your Peacekeeper will worry you’re trying to start a fight.
If you hear them say…
“I don’t understand why you’re always harping on the last election.”
👍 Try this…
“I think we can have a civil conversation about this.”
- Distinguish between nasty arguments and genuine efforts to understand.
👎 Avoid this…
“I think you’re hiding from this because it makes you uncomfortable.”
- Accusations make Peacekeepers even more anxious.
Additional communication styles...