Who you’re talking to dictates what you say. Review our Communication Styles if you haven’t already. And remember: These examples show communication skills, and do not indicate correct or incorrect viewpoints.
Choose the communication style of the person you’re speaking to:
If you hear them say…
“I’m sick of hearing Democrats like you say there aren’t big problems with our election system.”
👍 Try this…
“Let me be clear: Our election system isn’t perfect. I think we disagree on what needs to be improved.”
- When a Defender distorts your point, clarify it, and find something to agree with.
👎 Avoid this…
“Stop assuming you know what I think.”
- Avoid getting worked up with a Defender.
If you hear them say…
“Buying into Trump’s lies about the 2020 election is undemocratic. I thought you were patriotic.”
👍 Try this…
“I love this country just as much as you do. I feel like I have the right to raise questions about the 2020 election. Can I explain where I’m coming from?”
- Don’t let a Defender put words in your mouth. Stay calm and clarify.
👎 Avoid this…
“I think it’s you who doesn’t love America.”
- Don’t get defensive with a Defender. It will backfire.
If you hear them say…
“So you’re saying there’s never been a single instance of voter fraud?”
👍 Try this…
“Let me be clear: I’m sure it’s happened. But my view is that it’s not enough to sway a presidential election.”
- When someone exaggerates your view, calmly restate it.
👎 Avoid this…
“You’re completely distorting what I’m saying.”
- Don’t make accusations. If a Defender continues to exaggerate your view, exit the conversation.
Additional communication styles...